What is this Ennui?
I can’t focus my attention and don’t know why. Everything is “meh”.
I can summon no enthusiasm and have nothing to strive for.
Music fails to capture me, either in experience or creation.
Everything is hard and requires an effort I can’t seem to summon.
I go on through lack of any other sensible option rather than a quest for some goal.
My will to act is drained and I let the world happen around me.
I feel that I merely exist in the world.
Apart from it instead of a part of it.
Disenfranchised from my own life, unable to influence its path or or my experience of it.
What is this?
It’s not dark, but neither is it light.
There are no extreme emotional shades, just a grey fog of incapacity.